Having worked with kids for 20+ years as a Martial Arts Instructor and mentor, I’ve had my fair share of “They want to quit and I don’t want to force them to go…” conversations.
And at first glance, not wanting to force someone to do something sounds legit…
…Because the last thing we want is resentment and misery for all involved.
However, misery is rarely how students feel at the end of any class they attend.
In fact, students most often leave class feeling… great. They’re smiling, joyful, and proud because of that sense of accomplishment that comes from completing something hard.
…See what appears to be “unmotivated” on the surface is really just comfort zone talk deep down.
…It’s a desire to avoid work and do more play. To stay cozied up versus getting down and dirty with some exercise. To kick off the shoes and video game versus kicking some heavy bag’s butt.
And there’s no better example of this than what I see in myself.
…Do you know how many times I want to go to the gym? Zero.
…Do you know how often I try to find excuses not to go? Every time.
But, I still go.
…Why? Because I know the benefits. And I know that I’ve never regretted a workout completed.
And this is the difference we need to teach our kids.
Resistance before is natural and will always be present. And if there’s resentment after, then yes, maybe a deeper conversation is needed. But, if a better state is the typical byproduct? Then you know it’s not resentment that the kids will be building when you push them to go… it’s discipline.