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Month: September 2021

Fragmented Communication

Published on September 16, 2021

What’s worse than not communicating?

Fragmented communication that gets misconstrued.

It gives the illusion that communication happened when really, it didn’t.

And what follows are actions that are taken on unclear, confused, incomplete information.

…What leads to fragmented communication? Fragmented listening.

What leads to fragmented listening? Fragmented attention.

And what leads to fragmented attention? A person’s belief in their ability to multi-task.

Here’s the thing: you can’t. So, don’t.

Start single-tasking your attention with those whom you’re speaking with.

And if you can’t single-task with them, then don’t even try or pretend to try to.

Fragmenting a conversation can do far more harm than not having the conversation at all.

Living In Imaginary Prison

Published on September 15, 2021

Living your truth will set you free.

Living a lie will confine you into a cell of your own making.

Freedom is saying what you think and how you feel, as who you are.

Captivity is saying what you think others want to hear, based on how they feel, so that you can be who they think you are.

Don’t you see? The entire thinking process is under arrest by the anarchical judgements of others.

But, here, in this prison, there are no iron bars. There are no orange jumpsuits. There are no keys or guards.

This cell, the one you might find yourself in when you live a lie, is imaginary.

Whatever guards, keys, jumpsuits, and iron bars you feel incarcerated by, have been (and can only ever be) sentenced by you.

And so is the case for your sentence to freedom—it’s all decided within the confines of your mind.

So, how do you free yourself?

  1. Share your truth—with those closest to you, first. This is the key that will unlock your cell.
  2. Embody your truth—start to carry your truth with you into the outer areas of connection in your life. This is you walking out of jail and adjusting back to the “real world.”
  3. Live your truth—Continue to embody your truth until your truth (finally) becomes you.

Discovering Stasis [Poem]

Published on September 14, 2021 
Sitting outside
on a beautiful day
the sun warms my skin
as the wind playfully rushes by
and in one cool sweeping grasp
steals it
before I can act

It is then
in but the span of a moment
that I feel nothing
neither warm nor cool
not wind nor sun
and my skin is dissolved
into the world
as the entirety of the world
is dissolved into my skin

How curious
that I am reminded
in but the span of a moment
that stasis can be found
maybe not permanently
but in the spaces in between

Where nothing is triggering
but nothing is comforting either
when wind finally arrives
and sun touches down once again
where all forces momentarily pause
and take much needed rest
before rushing again quickly
to wherever they need to be next

How Are You Spending The Building Blocks Of Your Life?

Published on September 13, 2021

Time, energy, attention—these are the fundamental building blocks of what a life is composed of.

With what you’ve been given, you can either choose to spend, save, or invest these blocks—just as it is with money.

When you spend time, energy, or attention—it’s gone. Like when you watch a show on TV. There’s no return of more time, energy, or attention—it’s just used.

When you save time, energy, or attention—you increase what little you had to a little more. Like when you hire a professional to do a professional service. The time it took you to get the money to pay the professional is far less than the time it would have taken you to do the job yourself—so you pay them. Resources saved.

When you invest time, energy, or attention—you stand to multiply what little you had into much more. Like when you learn new skills and/or gain new knowledge. Not only do you no longer need to hire someone for their skills or knowledge, but you no longer need to hire them for the rest of your life. The return is exponential.

A good exercise to spend some time on:

  • Write down each task of your day.
  • Label each task as being either a spending, saving, or investing of time/ energy/ attention.
  • Think about how you might save and add more investments to your day.

Easy For You. Hard For Others.

Published on September 11, 2021

When work aligns with your strengths, it flows and feels easy—even when it’s hard.

When work aligns with your weaknesses, it crawls and feels hard—even when it’s easy.

A good indication that you’re in alignment with your strengths is if you lose track of time while working.

If you find yourself constantly checking the time, either the work you’re doing is too mundane or you’re in alignment with your weaknesses.

Ask yourself: What’s easy for you that’s hard for others?

And then figure out ways you can do more of that.

Anti-Perfectionism

Published on September 10, 2021

Perfectionism doesn’t beget perfection.

If anything, perfectionism begets hesitation and disappointment—over and over again.

For every time you look close—another flaw, wrinkle, fault presses itself forward and prevents you from acting or feeling in the desired way.

And as long as perfection is the standard, disappointment will continue to be the byproduct.

Why? Because perfection is the antithesis of being human—we are anti-perfect creatures.

We’re filled with flaws, wrinkles, and faults that are constantly pressing themselves forward into the forefront of our minds.

They demand our attention and are constantly reminding us of the paradox of our situation: imperfect creatures fighting to become perfect.

And so we hesitate. We feel disappointment. We fill with anguish.

Until, of course, we don’t.

Until we align with our nature rather than fight it. Until we fill our minds with acceptance rather than inadequacy. Until we stop seeking perfection and start embracing what’s imperfect.

Until we finally choose to become anti-perfectionists.

The Path To Easier

Published on September 9, 2021

Things usually get harder before they get easier.

If things aren’t going as easily as you’d like, maybe it’s because you’re avoiding what’s hard.

  • Relationship issues? Usually stem from an avoidance of hard conversations.
  • Career issues? Usually result from not doing enough of what’s hard, first.
  • Joy issues? Usually turn up when harder to handle emotions aren’t properly dealt with.

The solution, of course, is to stop avoiding what’s hard and confront it head on.

Only then will the path finally become easier.